Friday, January 29, 2010

A Mass Shooting Occured

Ok here is a question for everyone. Who was the first person/couple to register for a baby? My second question is HOW IN THE HECK did they get through it without any help?

Yes that is right Kim and I entered the registration nation for our baby girl and I have to tell you that I owned that Pricing Gun. To be honest I could be the fastest draw in the west. Yes Faster than Ned Nedalander.

So the night started out in the bedding section where we found out that a baby needs 4-6 sets of every type of bedding. Bassenett bedding, Portable crib bedding, crib bedding, living room bedding, sleeping in the high chair bedding, etc, etc, etc. That's ok we ended up doing ok.

We then moved to the Diaper section. WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP!!! sorry for the pun! I was lost from that moment on. Cue the speed dial to Abby and Mark. Thank you Abby for telling us that pampers are good for newborns and huggies are good for toddlers. "Keep the phone by you Abby because we have no clue what we are doing"

2 Seconds later... Abby what type of monitor do you have? What is a safety sheet? What is this what is that?

Ok I'm going to stop asking Abby and ask the Babysrus staff. Excuse me mam 'what is the best type of bottle?' Oh never mind!!! The Sales woman was a 13 year old girl. Actually mam I hope you don't know the answer to that question.

I have to be honest. My gun skills were tested when I had to start scanning the breast cream. It's just not the same when you point a gun at anything with the title "Breast" on it. AWKWARD!

It was all down hill from there. Kim's feet started hurting, we couldn't find the convertable car seats, and worst of all there are no unisex diaper bags (I'm going to have to find a man bag online) A couple can have 2 diaper bags right? If they have separate sinks whats' the difference with having 2 diaper bags.

So the night was done. 133 items scanned. Which was average...said the sales woman. Ugh!!! I guess i'm just going to have to deal with being an average father....

But I will tell you one thing: All the items in the world will not make my baby happy. My baby needs only one thing and she will get it every day of her life. MY LOVE!

Join me fellow Americans and let's start a registration revolution. Give Love , Not Breast Milk Storage bags.

Peace I'm out!

4 comments:

Cara S. said...

This made me laugh. Want the even worse news? By the time you get around to having your second or third, all the stuff you registered for for the first is outdated, unsafe, etc. I think it's all a big conspiracy...

B and B said...

oh, ernie. this is great. haha. when ben and i went to start our registry, i new he was dreading it, so i told him that we didn't have to do it all in one night, and that whenever he was getting sick of it just to tell me and we'd leave the rest for later. well, little did i know that i'd only get about 30 minutes out of him (and seriously only about 12 items). i was a little disappointed, but had to keep my word, so we left. i did a LOT more research before we went the next time so that we could go faster. i HIGHLY recommend getting a book called "Baby Bargains", which is basically like a Consumer's Report for all things baby. We found it very useful in deciding which brands, etc, to pick. good luck! betsy

Sweet Home Colorado said...

Glad I could help a little, or maybe a lot! It was fun fielding your phone calls! I love all things baby!!! Mark isn't so crazy about that quality of mine! Love you guys and can't wait to meet this little girl who will have all this fun stuff!

Susan said...

Thanks for the laugh, Ernie. I was browsing blogs while eating lunch today, and this made me laugh out loud. We're up to 6 nieces/nephews (5 under age 3) in our family - and all this stuff just adds to the chaos.